About That Brew Part

Congratulations to Brandon Graham, who is about to get paaaaaaaid as the 13th overall pick of the Philidelphia Eagles.

And that wraps up what I've got for Michigan news.  So on a slow Friday, let's talk.  Let's talk about the "Brew " part of this here website's name, because I've got a bone to pick with you, Mr. Snooty Bear Drinker Maize n Brew Dave.  First, I want you to look at this picture:

via geekstar.com

Dark Horse, huh?

Me? I’m waiting for my stash of New Glarus Spotted Cow ale to arrive.

New Glarus Spotted Cow Ale?  You know who else liked New Glariton Spotted Udder, or whatever you call it?  Mao.  That's right.  Communist China Mao.  I looked it up, don't worry about it.  Here's a pro-tip.  If you're beer needs more than 3 letters to tell you what to expect, then you need to switch beer.  PBR.  MGD.  BL.  These are beers for Americans, because damnit, Americans don't want to spend too much time on a stupid toungue twister to order their beer. 

And I see that you're waiting for your bovine-inspired beer? 

 You know that literally every package store in the country carries any number of perfectly fine American beer that you can pronounce, right?  You don't have to wait!  You can just go right down to the store, pick up your 2 or 3-lettered choice, and commence drinking - right there in the parking lot if you want (in fact, this is encouraged).  Don't worry about those guys in the alley - they respect your choice of beer, and probably wouldn't mind one themselves, which you can afford to do because your american beer comes with an american price.

You know what else, Dave?  You probably need a bottle opener for that fancy-pants beer of yours.  Well I don't have a bottle opener Dave.  You know what that means?  More waiting.  More waiting for my beer that I'm already waiting on.  Do you ever get to drink this beer, Dave?  Or do you wait for it?  Because I'll be in the parking lot, being an American.

I want you to take a good hard look at that picture again.  Then go look in the mirror, and decide who's side your on.  There's plenty of room in the parking lot with me, should you actually want to drink your beer.  And if not, I think you know who will be waiting.

via www.blackheartgoldpants.com

So I think we all know what I'll be drinking this weekend.  What about you guys?