Revisiting Past Pain: Michigan to Play Appalachian State in 2014

by Maize n Brew Dave on Aug 26, 2011 10:10 AM CDT in Michigan Football

Seriously.

Why?

This makes as much sense as returning to the back stage dressing room where the actor playing Mr. Mistoffelees touched you inappropriately twenty years ago, just to see if the room's still there. It's still there. It happened. Oh God, the memories. Why in God's name did you go back there again?

No? Just me? Moving on.

In life there are bad things that happen to you, you deal with them, you move on, you try to bury them deep inside the innermost parts of your soul and pretend they didn't happen. The time you had your shorts pulled down during the middle school talent show. Crushed with your mind vice. The time you had to go to the bathroom so bad that you didn't even look at the sign and were already half out of your pants before you realized it was a women's restroom and now you're on the sex offender list. Buried deep. The time you lost to Appalachian State? It never happened. Denial. Yeah.... I'm doing just fine.... nothing wrong with me.... Oh God the pain....

Maybe 2014 will be our vengeance year. We'll schedule nothing but schools we've lost to in horrifying, soul crushing fashion. I can see it now... App State, Oregon, Toledo, Mississippi State as a non-conference slate. Maybe we can right all those wrongs. Yeah. If we beat them then the losses never happened. Yeah. That's how it works. VENGEANCE!

No.

Wait.

The pain....

Play App State again? Sure. Really. This is a great idea....

I'm going to go put my head in the oven.

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Admit it

You’re more likely to go to this game than one against any other 1-AA team.

That’s why it’s a smart business move. It stings like hell, but all is nothing compared to money in college football.

Schadenfreude ist die schoenste Freude

by Seer on Aug 26, 2011 10:41 AM CDT reply actions

will they be FBS by then? I thought they were trying to step up…

by Canzior on Aug 26, 2011 1:57 PM CDT up reply actions

That seems to be the rumor

They are supposed to be in the Big East by then.

by GoWings2008 on Aug 26, 2011 3:04 PM CDT up reply actions

I think the CUSA is more likely but I wouldn't be surprised to see them in the Sun Belt or Big East

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by Alex Cook on Aug 27, 2011 12:12 PM CDT up reply actions

This Michigan's chance for a Tosh.0 web redemption.

Just don’t screw it up this time!

by fitzmel on Aug 26, 2011 1:35 PM CDT reply actions

Dave, you forgot to include Colorado

Because there’s nothing I like watching more than replays of Kordell Stewart ripping our hearts out with a 70 yard bomb.

Even if App State is part of the Big East that year, we beat them by 100 pts, and they then go on to dominate the Big East, it will do nothing towards mollifying the Horror.

For every complex problem, there is an answer that is simple, easy to understand, and wrong.

by MosherJordan on Aug 26, 2011 4:12 PM CDT reply actions

I think Hoke has changed the tide on the rivalry. Hell people in Ohio are starting to believe him. Never in a million years I would have thought that. Selling Michigan jerseys is a good start.

by oaktown_wolverine on Aug 26, 2011 4:54 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs