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On Tap: Tax Fraud, Nutt Jokes, Going For 2

By Maize n Brew Dave

Happy comes early on Friday. Here's what's

On Tap

  1. Just When You Thought [PERIOD REDACTED] Couldn't Embarrass The School Any More
  2. Missing: Inside Game on 6'11" Dude. Reward if Found
  3. Ty Law Overturned
  4. Behold Big Ten Wonk's Glory
  5. You Have Faith. Really?
  6. Kiss Your Nutt Good-bye
  7. Training Bra Removed, NC State Fills out Staff
  8. SMQ Looks At Zook's Steaming Pile of Lies Recruiting
  9. Why Going For A Two Point Conversion Makes Sense
  10. Lions To Be Put Down
ED NOTE: Just saw the Lloyd Contract Piece. More Soon.

Robert Traylor Continues Grand Tradition of [PERIOD REDACTED] Players Embarrassing U of M - The Detroit Free Press and The Diag are reporting that [PERIOD REDACTED] player Robert "Tractor" Traylor appeared in federal court yesterday and pleaded guilty to aiding and assisting in the preparation of a false income tax return. Traylor could face up to 3 years in prison and fines as high as $100,000.

Traylor allowed Quassand Lewis, a Detroit drug dealer, to put two apartment buildings in the 600 block of Orleans in Detroit on Traylor's 2004 income tax return in an effort to hide Lewis' drug deals. Traylor, being the genius he is, then claimed a $205,668 loss of rental income. Sure. That's not going to arose suspicion at all.

Traylor played for a number of NBA teams, and as Other Andrew points out, was once traded straight up for Dirk Nowitski. Despite the trade, Traylor was never more than a sixth man in the League. At UM he was more of a distraction than an asset. I wish him luck in sorting his life out. I also wish that his name and Michigan's never appear in the same newspaper article again.

Dealing With a 6'11" Hole in the Ground - If you watched or listened to Wednesday's game or any of the preceding games, you probably noticed the 6'11" dude in a Michigan Uniform who played like he was 5'3". That would be Courtney Sims. Nathan Fenno at the Ann Arbor News takes a look at Sims' early conference season struggles and comes to the same conclusion we all have. Michigan has no hope of advancing to the NCAA's without more from Sims. The only problem is all of his teammates seem to think more touches for Sims are the answer.

Um. Why?

Did they miss the 7 turnovers on Wednesday? Sims doesn't need more touches, he's getting plenty, he needs to work harder. His rebounding this season has been pitiful. A good part of that has been due to his poor positioning and his inability to maintain a post presence on smaller players. If Sims starts working harder his god-given talent will come to the surface because, in all honesty, he is a very talented basketball player. It's just the drive isn't there. Correction. The drive has never been there.

Eric Lacy at the Detroit News sums it up perfectly:

"To shut teams down, especially good ones, players have to be relentless with pressure and take some kind of pride in doing it. It was tough to tell Wednesday night at the Kohl Center how bad this team wanted to win once things started going downhill.

For this team to succeed it's going to have to show desire, emotion, and effort. All of those things have been missing on the road this year.

We won't have to wait too long to see what kind of effort Michigan will put out on the road the rest of the season. On Saturday they visit Indiana in Bloomington. I'll be live blogging the game so check in Saturday Morning and leave your comments.

Saturday's a big game. Let's see which Sims, and for that matter which Michigan team shows up.

Bad Law - Special thanks to Arrowhead Pride for posting their story on former UM standout Ty Law in the Maize n Brew Diaries. Apparently, Ty didn't have the best year this past season. In fact, he was rated one of the Most Disappointing KC Chiefs of 2006. Much like his alma mater Ty had a decent year, 4 INTs, 1 sack and 61 tackles (career high). However, when you're getting paid $6 Million a year the fans tend to expect a lot more out of you.

The biggest problem is Law is 32 years old, coming off surgery, and likely beginning the steep decline that so many successful players eventually face. I'd be shocked if Law finishes his contract with KC. But then again, that's the beauty of the NFL. He doesn't have to. A salary cap hit and the team is out from under the contract.

That said, I'd expect Law to have a better season next year. The great ones always bounce back, and Law has proven over his career to be one of the best in the game. I'm hoping for Law and the Chiefs to have a resurgent 2007.

Ode To Joy Should Play When You Click On His Site - Well, if not Beethoven, then at least Peter Cetera.


Big Ten Wonk continues to impress with his statification of Big Ten play. Not content with numbers, stats, and formulae, Wonk took it a step further and made charts. Behold his aptly named Good/Bad Offense/Defense. Chart. John's analysis is the best out there. Go there. Now.

While you're there, take a look at his excellent wrap up of the UW/UM disaster.

We're Michigan Fans, We're Supposed to Be Optimistic - Well 101 of you voted, and for that I'm grateful. Surprisingly, despite Michigan's struggles, 60% of you think Michigan will somehow scrape into the NCAA's this year. Not so surprisingly, 40% of you do not. Take a look yourself.

Thanks to everyone for voting.

The new poll will be up shortly. Taking a page from Black Shoe Diaries, I'm asking what you would like me to focus on until football season starts anew. Take a look and let me know.

Nutt Supported By Administration - A day after getting picketed by Razorback supporters, the University of Arkansas reached deep down and gave a lift to their sagging Nutt. Coach Houston Nutt. With two Dicks on the roster next year I can only pray to the Comedy Gods in the deepest reaches of hell that he stays at Arkansas long enough to recruit kids name Chestie, Loade, and/or Booty.

Please. Let this happen.

If Nutt is cut off, at least we've got Joe Pa's Buns.

Back To An "A" Cup - New Wolfpack head coach Tom O'Brien finalized his staff with the hires of Philadelphia Eagles "defensive assistant-quality control coach" Mike Reed and former Middle Tennessee State head coach Andy McCollum. Reed will coach DBs and McCollum will handle the Linebackers. No word on their bra size.

Whadda Ya Mean He Ain't At No Florida? - Sunday Morning Quarterback. Go There. Read. Laugh.

Why Going For Two Ain't Such A Bad Idea - As the New York Times (via the Wizard of Odds) points out, going for the two point conversion is rapidly becoming a 50-50 proposition. It worked half the time in the NFL this past season and look what it did for Boise State. Very interesting read.

Losing Wearing on PSU Fans & Alumni- In the Detroit News' Big Ten wrap up the paper notes that no one is sticking around for PSU basketball games. Frankly almost no one is even showing up. It's been a tough season for a team that looked to have an outside NCAA chance and at a minimum an NIT bid wrapped up early in the season. Now a slew of Conference losses have them scrambling just to scrape up an NIT bid.