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Friday Happy Hour Talks a Little Smack, Has NIT Dreams, Can't Believe Someone "Donkey Kicked" a Cop

Maize n Brew gives you your daily (or semi-daily) rundown of all the Michigan Football, Michigan Basketball, College Football, and College Basketball news you need to get through the tedium of your boring desk job. For good measure we'll throw in a little irreverent information, comedy and commentary to help you salt away the time until the clock strikes 5pm.  Want it in 140 characters or less, follow us on Twitter! Or you can find us on Facebook! Here's what's ON TAP:

Stuff You Should Read Right Now:

The 2009 Moral Victory National Championship - Roll 'Bama Roll produces some of the greatest smack talkof all time. "We know who took home the Coaches Trophy but who really deserves to be called 'The People's Champion?'"

Doctor Saturday takes a look at the the college football season's sharpest turning points and tries to answer the question on everyone's mind: What the hell does USC see in Lane Kiffin, anyway?

Black Shoe Diaries is somewhat, well, amused? The words "donkey kick" and "women's track" are involved. Penn State track and field has never, ever been so interesting.

Big Ten Propoganda - Lake the Posts goes out of its way to hype the Big Ten's successful post-season along with announcing the Big Ten Media Days, which are set to begin on August 2nd in Chicago. We'll be there. And this time, we may even rport something!

Michigan Basketball

The Detroit News says the Wolverines need Key Victories this Week - No. They needed key victories during the out of conference season. Michigan's NCAA hopes aren't on life support. They'e dead and buried. Only a Frankenstein style exhumation, a la winning the Big Ten Tournament, is going to get them in. Ask Penn State how much good a great conference season does when your OOC resume is putrid.

Look, I'm pulling for Beilein and his boys as much as any Michigan fan, but the helter skelter nature of this team and its performance so far are not indicative of anything remotely resembling an invite to the Big Dance. The sooner we accept that, the better. Of course there is the argument that if Michigan beats UConn and all of a sudden that changes.

I don't think so. The problems on this team run pretty deep. No one other than Sims or Harris is averaging in double figures. Michigan's turning the ball over substantially more than last year. There is no leadership to speak of on the floor or in the locker (as far as we can tell). There is no one that can help Sims down low. Even if Michigan, through what I would only be able to classify as a fluke, beats UConn, there is no indication that Michigan won't drop another game they lead by 17. The lack of consistency has cost the Wolverines. In fact, it cost them an NCAA bid and will turn making the NIT (after an awful start) something to shoot for.

Michigan Basketball Tops Indiana, 69-45 -'s wrap up of the game.

Indiana at Michigan Game - UM Hoops dot Com wraps up Michigan's 25 point win over Indiana.

Michigan wakes up, cruises past Indiana - Cruises? No. Not after that first half. They just stopped playing horribly. 25 point win or not, Indiana (7-9) is not a very good team.

Michigan's defense aces its first rematch test of the year - Rothstein at Ann Arbor dot Com is a little more positive on the game than I was. C- for the offense is generous. Take out Sims and Harris and this team would struggle to score 30 a game right now.

Defenses made both Michigan and Indiana's offenses look 'sloppy' - Look? Ha. Are sloppy.

(more after the jump....)

Michigan Football

Mel Kiper Changes His "Draft Board" Around to Draw Attention to Himself - The Detroit News republishes Mel Kiper's latest Insider Draft Board from ESPN without linkage. Bet he loves that. Even so, he's got Brandon Graham at #23 in this year's draft. Still don't think Derrick Morgan is ten spots better than Graham. Maybe the other way around.

Three Michigan Football Freshmen Join Track Team - Denard Robinson, Joe Reynolds and Je'Ron Stokes joined the Wolverines' track and field team along with junior Troy Woolfolk. U-M has a home dual meet against Ohio State at noon Saturday where Robinson will run the 60 meter dash and Reynolds will compete in 600 meter. Stokes and Woolfolk will sit this one out. Good luck guys.

Mary Sue Coleman on the ongoing NCAA investigation into "Practicegate" - Ohhh! A quote from Mary Sue Coleman! Let's jump on it! "I am not anxious." It means something!!!

Around the Big Ten

Fallout from MSU Nerd Beatdown Continues to Ravage East Lansing - Former MSU player Ashton Leggett plead guilty on two counts of misdemeanor assault yesterday. "I would like to apologize for my actions,' Leggett told Judge David L. Jordon in an East Lansing court Thursday. 'As a group, we weren't thinking.' Yeah. Duh. Eight more have assault charges pending.

William Gholston is Detroit News' No. 1 Blue Chip player - Still committed to MSU. For now.

The Troubled Mind, And Building Of, Jay Paterno - Black Shoe Diaries with an interesting take on the man, the myth, the legend: Jay Pa. Wierd comments section follows.

Do Good Recruiting Classes Really Make a Good Team? - The Daily Gopher takes a look at the Big Ten's recruiting classes since 2005, actually putting Michigan No. 1 in the conference in recruiting over the last fwe years. Unfortunately, as this site and every other Michigan site has chronicled, the inability to keep these high profile recruits on campus has hindered the Wolverines' progress.