/Scene: Ann Arbor, Michigan. Schembechler Hall. Through a walleyed camera view, we fly through Schembechler Hall, blasting past Michigan memories of glories past and present. Through a set of intricately carved wooden doors, we find ourselves in the Athletic Department offices, and suddenly through the door marked "Athletic Director". We join the scene as Michigan Athletic Director Dave Brandon puts the headset of his telephone into its cradle. A large smile creases his face and.../
/looking up, Brandon sees Michigan Head Football Coach Brady Hoke standing in his doorway. Perturbed, Brandon speaks.../
: We'll see if it even registers. They've been serving deep fried mice dipped in Red Hot as hot wings to those degenerates in Columbus for almost two years and we can't keep up with demand. The medical labs we've been ordering them from are starting to run out.
/Brandon is obviously upset his ruse didn't work/
: I noticed. Eleven commits already for the 2012 class, that's pretty amazing.
: Christ Dave, have you seen the roster I inherited? Half of our scholarships are taken up by slot receivers/running backs. A quarter of the roster is LB/DE tweeners. And the rest are either starting or injured. I mean, did you see our linebacking corps last year. It was like trying to send a horse out to stud and having him hump a fence post instead.
: Fine. It is a funny visual. Let's be clear, I'm pretty pleased with the recruiting. You've got some linemen and linebackers committed and this may be our best class in 6 years when it's all said and done. So answer me this.
: /shakes away the cobwebs/ Nice try fat man..... Wait... I know what that was..... NO! That's impossible.
: Yup. I gotta tell you, it took a lot out of Denard. But he's back up to 100% now that he's rested. Now we don't have to take him on every recruiting visit, and he can finally get used to the offense.
/Brandon pushes a button on his desk and a false wall slides open revealing a map of the US with yellow lights dotting the map./
: You bet it is. Here's the list. We know who we want.
: You've seen our success against Michigan St. this year, haven't you?
and so it begins..............................................................
/fade to black/