It is with sad condolences that USC's Cody Kessler will be graduating upon season's conclusion.
Otherwise we'd just tell him to sporadically lose games and then fire off on the Trojans to ignite the scoreboard the following week.
Frown face emoji, crying emoji, face that looks like they're up to no good emoji. 5-2 on locks and a peculiar angle heading into Week 9.
Care to join?
Lock of the Week
Miami at Duke (Line TBD)
How messed up is the ACC?
Pittsburgh and North Carolina are like, kind of good, Georgia Tech only wins on blocked field goals, head coaches are being fired and Syracuse is tossing up monstrous numbers on offense, which means the world may end on Sunday.
But even if it does, check out how you can scrape up a win on Saturday to pay for your final meal full of gluttony and shame.
The Blue Devils have covertly climbed the ladder to No. 18 and have just a lone loss, which came to Northwestern in Week 3. Since that defeat it's been smooth sailing with victories over Boston College, Georgia Tech, Army and Virginia Tech.
When Duke hosts Miami, it'll be all sorts of combustion for The U. Upon losing yet another heart breaker to Florida State in Week 7, the 2,083 fans in attendance did all they could to cheer for the 'Canes last weekend versus Clemson.
Spoiler: the cheers weren't enough :(
Clemson hangs 58, Brad Kaaya gets hurt--and OH YEAH--AL GOLDEN, HE GONE. MORE LIKE AL SILVER.
Before I delete my account following that witticism, here's what you should be looking for: everyone will be pounding Duke to pummel Miami. No head coach off of a shutout loss, I don't disagree.
But Duke has gotten off to super fast starts in 2015, covering every single first half line. Night game, heartless Miami club, Duke looking for win number seven? I think Kyle Singler and one of the 31 Plumlee brothers both suit up and play in the slot on Saturday, but both listed as doubtful with 'trying to find a roster spot on a professional basketball team.'
Pick: Duke First Half (expect number to be around 4.5)