An Annual Reminder: Do Not Tweet At Recruits

I don’t think I’m good at these public service announcement type things, but just so you know, be very careful about that new Jurassic World place that opened up, go see Rogue One, and DO NOT TWEET AT RECRUITS.

I bring this up now, as opposed to any other day, because apparently it’s been playing a noticeable role in the recruitment of Aubrey Solomon (yes, the guy who said something dumb and then apologized for it), and Michigan’s own coaches, who are trying to win Michigan games, or so I’ve been told, are very annoyed and unhappy about it.

Now, I know I covered a lot of subjects in the last two paragraphs, so let’s review. Jurassic World, definitely do not recommend. Tweetin’ at ‘croots, definitely do not recommend. The overuse of commas, I also do not recommend, although I do it anyway - to great effect, I might add, but that could be my bloated ego talking.

And lastly, tweeting at all recruits, certain recruits, ISIL, ISIS, potato farmers, the guy living next door, Sofia Vergara, people who use the “F” word, people living in Georgia, people whose name rhymes with “corroboree,” and people trying to decide where to go to college - please do not tweet at these people. At all. Don’t do it. I’m serious. Look at my face.

Let the coaches do their job and let recruits make their decisions. The end.

Thank you. And comma.